Manic behavior

I have discovered that while manic, I tend to be more sarcastic and, more noteworthy, a bit bigoted. This i am not proud of being, I am not discriminatory about the who, but rather, the why. The reason that there is a why is because when people do things without thought or moral, i hate them all equally. I’m usually a easy person to deal with but when I’m up, I have very little patience. It’s been that way for a long time. There no fairness to it either.

My wife and children have dealt with a volitile husband and father. My tantrums have been an embarrassment to me and those around me. When manic, I can “do no wrong”. Yeah, right, no wrong. .I have done much of my best work when in mania. I self start and usually reject help. I can endure more hard work and discomfort and get more done. But, it comes at a cost, i alienate people, and i have a short temper that flairs at the slightest provocation. I used to think that I couldn’t identify any manic states, but now that I have calmed down some, I can see that my life was littered with them.

Work is the same way, my low tolerance for stupid, causes anger which I keep away from customers best i can. Coworkers bear the brunt there. Again, not fair, not logical, it just is what it is.

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